Hello my wee one,

I’ve been learning more and more piano… you seem to enjoy the lessons too! It seems like the ONLY time during the day I’m not feeling woozy. Sometimes I wonder if you’ll act the same way I did when I was four years old. There are still memories in my head of having a piano at home and having this overwhelming feeling of wanting to play it… but didn’t really know how. I spent my whole life wanting to play the keys, wishing I knew the notes, the chords… beautiful musical melodies to be created from nowhere… and here I am, carrying you from within, going back to the basics of when *I* was a child. I could teach you flute ever want to play that! It’s pretty fun.

There is something else I’ve been thinking about, my sweet child. There are days I wonder what kind of parent I’ll be, especially when it’s time for you to go to school. Will I be the cool kind of parent that lets you carry a cell phone around? Or will I turn into one of those psycho crazy soccer moms or pageant moms who vicariously lives their lives through their kids? I’ll tell you the same thing my father told me. Do what you want, but make me proud.

What’s important to me more than anything is that you never fear me. I don’t want to turn into one of those mothers who you can’t talk to or fear they’ll hurt you or harshly punish you simply for bringing up a taboo subject. If there is anything you ever want to discuss with me or daddy, all you have to do is come to us and say, “I’d like to have a discussion about something. When you get to a stopping point, can we talk?” I promise, anything you ever have on your mind, no matter how crazy or insane or embarrassing, we’ll be there for you. We’ll ALWAYS make time for you.

I love you….

Mommy