Dear sweet batkid,

As your daddy and I drove downtown to go shopping for a new birdfeeder, more maternity clothes, and a few decorative rugs… and right at the moment we crossed the intersection near the 47 bypass and College Ave., I blurted out, “Hey I have a question. How do we want to introduce our child to the movie The Dark Knight?”

It led to quite an interesting discussion on our values, which are not surprisingly… similar. As you may soon find out when you’re old enough to recognize my patterns, I’m not the type of person (and hopefully not the type of mother) who will censor things out of fear you won’t be able to “handle” them. There are so many parents out there who are overly-protective of their children to the point of neglecting to BE A PART of their life growing process. The movie, The Dark Knight, is very dark. It could be seen as potentially frightening in the sense that choices are made between good and evil and rides a fine line on ethical life behavior. However, it’s also one of those movies that MUST be SEEN if you want to get the “joy ride” that earth offers you.

So the question is NOT “Will we show you the movie,” because I’m convinced that one day, you’ll beg us to either let you watch it… or you’ll go off and do it behind our backs. The real question is, “When do we let you see it,” and “How do we get you in the right mindset to watch it?” I mean, it can be quite fascinating to ask oneself - at what point is something age appropriate and which mother dictator out there is deciding that? I will NOT be a dictator, my dear. It would be my worst fear come to life to have to censor things that YOU want to experience.

I may be the coolest mom (to you)… but perhaps one of the most irreverent, outspoken, unpredictable women out there that will drive *conservative mother-types* batty. I’m not going to turn into one of those wicked insane mothers, let’s get that straight now. Nor am I gonna be one of those ditzy airhead mothers who can’t teach her children anything. I will also do everything in my power to always be in a position that allows me to care for you financially. Sometimes things can happen in people’s lives that are out of their control, and it is my life goal to utilize the control I currently have to protecting your future. Your father and I love to travel, and we will work extra hard to allow time for small vacations so we can see the world first-hand. Above anything, I really wanna be a cool mom that inspires people to raise their children with not just compassion, but a combination of fantasy and reality. It is my hope that perhaps one day you’ll come to the realization that you’re a pretty lucky kid to have landed on earth… with us.

So anyway, the smart thing to do would be to watch you grow and then evaluate your maturity level. I do hope we raise you to be the type of kid who isn’t afraid of the dark or that the boogeyman is gonna get ya. If it makes you feel better, we keep baseball bats (and even naughty stuff like whips and chains that we’ll likely hint around but never actually talk about unless YOU bring it up and BEG us to talk about it, in which case… I’ll get as detailed as you can handle it.) and can open a can of whoop-ass on any intruder. The important thing is that you feel safe watching movies, which are nothing more than a combination of art direction, acting, writing, special effects (sometimes),  and cinematography. In real life, there are things that happen everyday (just watch the news) that are sickening, terrifying, and vile. Movies often reflect a little bit of real life while making it entertaining so people can experience a thrill ride.

I have a couple concerns with the movie Dark Knight. First, if we show it to you and you’re too young to understand it’s “just a movie,” you may have nightmares and/or be scared for many reasons (I could list em, but why?). Secondly, what if you see the movie and the whole thing is over your head? I mean, that’s the type of movie you WANT to see when you KNOW you’ll get it. Thirdly, what if you start acting like the Joker because he becomes your role model (let’s hope not, but if so… I’ll come visit ya in prison and buy you cigarettes from time to time so you can barter.)

So when is a good age? Some might say never. Some people may be too scared to see it just because of the hype. Some parents may say you can see it when you’re an adult. Others may say you can see it when you’re a teenager. You know what I say? I say you can watch it whenever you want AS LONG AS we have a long discussion first about what you should expect and what kind of attitude to take while watching it. That’s fair right? If we see you acting like a crybaby or woosing out during the movie or getting all scared (in a bad way), we’ll know you aren’t ready to watch LOTS of things. So suck it up and impress us that you can handle it and you’ll get to watch any movie you want.

Love
Mommy